Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Out With the Old, In With the New

I feel like I've been getting in trouble non-stop over the past couple of weeks. I really don't know what's gotten into me. Usually I can find something to blame it on, but this time I really can't.

In the middle (well, maybe towards the end..) of my acting like an idiot spree, I gave a friend bad advice in regards to handling one of her punishments. That advice caused her to get spanked even more, and thus, made me feel awful. Not only that, but it didn't make my husband too happy (rightfully so). After a long talk about how my actions affected her, I got spanked. His intention wasn't to give me a "full spanking". It was a harder spanking than normal, but much fewer swats. It was more of a reminder. But that reminder did more for us then I can even explain.

The spanking was like any other punishment I had ever received. I don't think he meant for it to be like that, but it was. And, I'm truly glad it was. It was a breakthrough for us.

Immediately after it was over, I felt the way I feel like I was "supposed to feel" after a punishment. Like the slate was truly cleaned, I'd been punished, it was over with, and we could all move on. But even more then that it gave me this extra drive to behave more.

Today I got spanked again (for something that happened the other day, but it was kind of a 2-part punishment because it was so major) and my husband used his "new way" of spanking again with only a few minor changes. Once again, it brought tears, forgiveness, redemption, and a feeling of "there's no way in hell I'm ever going to do that again".

I've never been one that likes change. Especially change that is temporarily worse for me. The spankings are more intense, they are different, but I am grateful.

This change has changed me.


  1. I'm happy for you Chels! (and sympathetic, I get spanked like that a lot, lol, and I hate it). But yeah, it IS effective for me, a lot of times more than the longer ones! But shhh, don't tell my husband that...;)

  2. thats the trick isnt it for our HOH to find what works to change our behaviour. Thank you for sharing and well done to you two. HOpe you can keep up with your resolution - we all have weeks like that when we seem to nothing but get into trouble
    love and hugs kiwi xxx

  3. Wow, Chels, this post was awesome. I know it is sometimes hard for you to share this part of Dd on your blog, so I'm proud of you. You did a great job. I'm really glad your hubby was able to expiriment and make some adjustments to make things work better for the two of you. The feeling (that one you're supposed to get) does make a huge difference. It's such a little thing really,but such an important part of why we do this thing we do. I'm happy for you! :)

  4. I'm glad you could share that, we all learn from each other. My husband and I, we are always evolving and I sure don't like bad changes either- but our guys are just that good..lol.

  5. O.k. I'm trying to figure out why you would get spanked for giving advice to a friend you were trying to help. Maybe I don't understand how this works, but i don't think my husband would or ever has punished for something like this. Sure if I intentionally was trying to hurt my friend, he may see the need. Clearly, that was not your intent.

    We follow the taken in hand forum, so maybe they are more different than I thought. But, i thought spankings were reserved for the more severe offenses or to be used more as a last resort when other things don't work. I am not getting spanked for every little thing. Are we misunderstanding the purpose of cdd?

  6. Anonymous,

    I left boiled eggs on the stove top and forgot about them. Burned the pan to a black charcoal and set off the smoke alarms. It wasn't my intent to almost burn the house down, but I did get spanked for it.

    I don't know if you are new to dd or not. It seems as if you might be (and forgive me if I am mistaken)but every one practices a little differently. Especially if you have lived this lifestyle for a while. Starting out you go a little easier and possibly lighter on the spankings.
    Sorry, I don't know much about Taken in Hand and how it works.

  7. I am intrigued by the idea of spousal punishment, but do you punish your husband too? I really do understand the idea of being spanked, and having it alleviate guilt since you "paid your dues" but surely, he makes mistakes as well? I am not judging, I am just curious.