I feel like I've been getting in trouble non-stop over the past couple of weeks. I really don't know what's gotten into me. Usually I can find something to blame it on, but this time I really can't.
In the middle (well, maybe towards the end..) of my acting like an idiot spree, I gave a friend bad advice in regards to handling one of her punishments. That advice caused her to get spanked even more, and thus, made me feel awful. Not only that, but it didn't make my husband too happy (rightfully so). After a long talk about how my actions affected her, I got spanked. His intention wasn't to give me a "full spanking". It was a harder spanking than normal, but much fewer swats. It was more of a reminder. But that reminder did more for us then I can even explain.
The spanking was like any other punishment I had ever received. I don't think he meant for it to be like that, but it was. And, I'm truly glad it was. It was a breakthrough for us.
Immediately after it was over, I felt the way I feel like I was "supposed to feel" after a punishment. Like the slate was truly cleaned, I'd been punished, it was over with, and we could all move on. But even more then that it gave me this extra drive to behave more.
Today I got spanked again (for something that happened the other day, but it was kind of a 2-part punishment because it was so major) and my husband used his "new way" of spanking again with only a few minor changes. Once again, it brought tears, forgiveness, redemption, and a feeling of "there's no way in hell I'm ever going to do that again".
I've never been one that likes change. Especially change that is temporarily worse for me. The spankings are more intense, they are different, but I am grateful.
This change has changed me.