Sunday, August 26, 2012

5 Things - Week 4

Sorry I've been kind of slow on blogging this week. It's been one of those weeks where things have been so busy, I haven't been feeling great, and life is just hectic. I appreciate ya'll being patient. :-) 


1: We bought a house! And it's a super awesome house, too. We're so excited. Some of you may remember, on week 2 of the 5 things post, I was explaining how we decided to buy a house for a few years while our new home is being built. Well, finally, we picked one out (we had it narrowed down to 2, and it was a hard choice) and it all became official this past week- now we just have to wait for closing, and start the super fun process of moving. We're really excited. 

2: The 24th came and went. For most people, the 24th of each month probably means nothing. But, for me, it means a lot. Well, it used to at least. The 24th of each month used to symbolize the day that I was able to cross another month off my 1 year no spanking challenge. But, ever since last months setback, now the 10th is the magical day. I'd be lying though if I said that I wasn't majorly disappointed yesterday. I tried not to let it show, but finally broke down at like 3 AM. I really think that I put too much pressure on myself. :( I just want to complete this challenge so bad. 

3: Diapers and DD?? Does anyone understand what this is all about? For some reason, the past few weeks, the number of emails I've gotten, comments I've read, and blog posts I've seen have focused on this crazy "DD trend" about diapering your wife if she acts like a toddler. I don't understand it at all although I will say that I haven't really tried to because it just seems so odd to me. Has anyone else noticed this new "trend"? What do you think- anyone else think it's really....out there...or is it just me?

4: My Bottom Smarts- If you haven't checked out Bonnie's blog, My Bottom Smarts, I'll fill you in. She does this thing called Sunday Brunch every weekend with a new question, and it's pretty interesting. I linked her this week because the question is an age old DD question about spanking over or under the clothes. The responses should be pretty interesting, I think.  

5: This isn't a website link, but I still wanted to share. It fits with DD perfectly. 



..and here's something to think about.. 


Have an awesome rest of your weekend, everybody!

-Chelsea   

Monday, August 20, 2012

I've been dreading writing this entry...

*Super deep breath* 

I've been dreading writing this blog entry for a couple of days (actually, like a week). I actually really want to share some good news with everyone, but I'll have to wait, because this entry is going to suck.

My 1-year no spanking challenge has hit a slightly minor major roadblock, and I have to start over. 

Now, the minor piece of good news here is the way we have it structured is I'm starting the month over, not the entire challenge over. So, eventually I'll still get 12 months of no spanking (hopefully), which is the goal, but still, this sucks. I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really was looking forward to celebrating my "2 month no spanking challenge" here in about a week, and now it is a month behind. To say I'm frustrated is an understatement. 



I'm hurt, sad, frustrated, and extremely disappointed. I don't think ya'll have any idea how bad I wanted this. :-( 

So, for everyone asking how my challenge is going- there's your answer. I'm like a month behind schedule. Sooooo frustrating. 

The challenge has started over (by a month) for several reasons. But that's the bottom line. I made it a whole freakin' month. 

Frustrated is an understatement. 

But, I'm still determined. I'm going to make it a year. I'm determined to make this the only set back, but I can't lie and say I'm not extremely disappointed because, as the what would have been 2 month date approaches, it just makes me want to cry. I think I'm way too hard on myself.

Ok, vent over.  

Have an awesome Monday, everyone!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

5 Things - Week 3

I can't believe it's Sunday already, that this year is over halfway done, or that it's almost fall. This year is just going by way too fast.

I hope everyone has had an awesome weekend. We spent a bunch of time together as a family, watched some preseason football, did a little shopping, and just relaxed! It felt so good, seeing as how we've been so busy lately.

 1: It's FINALLY football season: (Almost). I know most of you probably are like "ugh, football season means I'm going to lose my husband to ESPN and the NFL Network for the next few months" . But, for us it's super exciting. We LOVE football. I'm not a huge fan of preseason football (because the talented, and good players are usually out of the game by like the first 30 minutes...) If you're a football fan, who are your favorite teams? We're giant Texas Longhorn fans (because that's where I went to college, and grad school..and thankfully my husband loved them before we even met!) and for NFL we like the Denver Broncos. :-) 

2: We heard another couple talking about DD at a restaurant! It was the weirdest thing. Clint and I went out to dinner with a group of people the other night. Since we had a pretty large party, they sat us in this special area of the restaurant where there was another really large party (like 20 people..). So, we sat down, ordered our food, were talking to the people we went with, etc. when all the sudden we here this lady at the other table talking (extremely loud....) to the group she was with saying "remember that time you spanked mom..." and then her voice got quieter, and we didn't hear the rest, but Clint and I immediately looked at each other like "what the hell". A few minutes later, the ladies husband said "well that last time I spanked you for..." and then his voice got quieter too. Everyone in our group was like "what the heck is going on at that table" and Clint and I were just thinking to ourselves wow, another potential DD couple! It was crazy!

3: Implement Guide Part 2 is up! Finally. Sorry for the delay, everyone. So, that completes the implement guide. :-) I might do another guide in the future (once I find another topic...I'm all open to ideas!). I'm also just about caught up on comments- yippee!!

4: Love, Honor, and Obey Him : I didn't link this post to a specific entry, like I've done in weeks past, but this blog is definitely one to follow as Becky develops it in the weeks, months, and years to come. I've been fortunate enough to get to know Becky (and her adorable family!) over the past few weeks, and she's a lot like me. I encourage everyone to read her blog, comment, and make her feel welcome in Blogland! 

5: This is a genius idea, everyone. I can't take the credit for it (I found it on Pinterest) but I think it's a great idea, and something almost everyone could benefit from. So, here's how it works.

On your wedding day (if you aren't married), your anniversary, or another special day, you and your loved one write letters to each other (explaining why you fell in love with the person, whatever else you want to say...you get the idea) and then take a bottle of wine, a gift card to somewhere you love...something that you guys enjoy, and put the letters and the object in a box, and seal it up (then, place the box somewhere out of sight, like underneath your bed). Then, on your first big fight (or, really any heated argument), take time to yourselves and calm down, then open the box together and read the letters, drink the wine, make the dessert, watch the movie (whatever you put in there) and it will help you remember why the two of you fell in love in the first place. 

See, genius idea. :-) 

Also: Happy Wedding Day to Ash!! She is getting married in just a few days (Wednesday) and Clint and I are so happy for her. Congratulations and best wishes, Ash! We hope your day is perfect.   

 

Thursday, August 16, 2012

The Spanking Implement Guide: Part 2

Last week I put up The Spanking Implement Guide: Part 1 which you can read by clicking here. That part focused more on covering some of the implements that are available, a pain scale, and a few other things. This part is going to focus more on questions that people may have (or that my husband and I have gotten a lot of) regarding implements. Like I said in part 1, I know that spanking implements aren't really something that a lot of DD wives like to discuss. However, I feel it's important because you do have somewhat of a say in what you get spanked with (or what is considered "off the table"). I'd hope so, at least. So without delaying this any further, let's get right to it. 

The Spanking Implements Guide: Part 2

The same "warning" that I gave in part 1 is going to apply here in part 2 as well. That warning was this: Some of the links within this entry reference some pretty questionable websites where implements are sold. The link on my blog should link directly to the page with the implement I'm referring to. Anything else that you may choose to find while browsing around the site, most likely, does not reflect on my personal views on what is/is not OK within DD. 

Now that we've gotten that out of the way, I figured we'd start with a popular question that my husband and I have gotten many times. 

Where Do You Purchase Spanking Implements?

In part 1, I linked where my husband and I purchased our spanking implements. However, we only use a few and there are many other types of implements out there. 

What You Can Purchase At "Common Stores": 

By "common stores" I mean ones that are found almost anywhere in the United States, and other countries have similar versions of these. These stores are ones like WalMart, Target, supermarkets, that sort of thing. At those stores you can find implements such as..

  • Wooden spoons
  • Hairbrushes (you may not be able to find high-quality wood ones, which are nice because they don't break easily, but you can find plastic ones)
  • Fly swatters
  • Belts
  • Paint stirrers
  • Ping pong paddles
  • Bath brushes
  • Ruler
  • Slipper
  • Cutting board
  • Tilt wand
and more. As you can see, majority of the spanking implements are covered on that list, because they double as common household items. (Just a note- paint stirrers are typically free in the paint section). 

However, for those of you who are wanting to use something a little more "made for spanking" (for lack of a better word) you may need to look a little harder. Implements like paddles are hard to find in stores (because what would you use that for, other than to spank?) so you may need to go online for something like that. The following is a list of websites that sell high quality spanking implements. 

  • eBay : You may not think to go to eBay for spanking implements, but you'd be shocked. A quick eBay search of "spanking paddle" pulls up over 100 results, and I'd say well over half are decent. Some of them are even on a "buy it now" feature, as opposed to an auction setting, so you don't have to worry about bidding. Like all items on eBay, the implements you find will really range in price. I'd recommend eBay for items like paddles, however, I'm sure you could also find canes, straps, etc. 
  •  Cane-Iac: This is where my husband purchased a few of our implements (paddle and cane). The site is kind of questionable just in terms of some of the items they sell, but the spanking implements are really high quality. The site sells pretty much every spanking implement you could think of such as paddles (wooden, rubber, lexan, and acrylic), canes (acrylic, lexan, rattan, and wooden), straps, and they also sell some pretty unique implements that I'm not real sure I'd recommend, but they're on there for you to check out. They also sell this pretty neat little gadget called The Spanking Buddy which is for those who like to use their hand to spank. The Spanking Buddy fits over your hand, allowing you to still give a "hand spanking" without it hurting your hand. I've never been spanked with one, but I've heard that it really does work- even though it may feel slightly more intense than a traditional hand spanking. The site also sells a spanking kitchen tool set (with implements such as a spatula, but that are more high-quality and made for spanking), over the knee paddles, and much more. 
  • The London Tanners: I know this is a really popular spanking implement site. We've never ordered anything from here, but just from browsing around their site, it seems their products are really high-quality and their selection is pretty big. Similar to Cane-IAC, the London Tanners sell a wide variety of implements, and they even have their own series of implements called The Domestic Discipline Collection. The one downside, I think, to the London Tanners is that they are a little more pricey than other implement sites. But, like I said, the implements appear to be really high-quality and it's worth checking out. Also, although they are based in the UK, the site does ship worldwide. 
  • Wood Rage: Wood Rage only sells spanking paddles, so if you're looking for other implements, you may want to look elsewhere. However, their spanking paddles are customizable (which is pretty unique), and you can also pick out the type of wood, engrave them, and more. The site pretty much lets you customize the whole thing (including having holes drilled in). So, if you're looking for a wooden paddle, it might be worth it to check out Wood Rage. Also, shipping is free for everyone in the United States. If you don't live in the US, they do ship worldwide.
  • Etsy: Etsy is another site similar to eBay, except everything is handmade. I've ordered a few things from Etsy in the past (that are non-DD related!) and I absolutely love that site. However, until recently, I didn't even know you could order spanking implements off there, but apparently you can! They sell a pretty wide variety of implements, all handmade, such as spanking paddles, straps, etc. at a wide range of prices. If you search "spanking paddles" you'll get about 125 results alone. Not bad, huh?

There are other implements, such as switches, that you probably won't be able to find in stores, or online. But, for majority of the implements, you should be able to find. :-)



FAQ Implement Edition

With the help of my awesome husband, below are some of the most frequently asked questions we've gotten that pertain to implements. My hope is that, by putting them on the blog, it will help others who may have the same questions. 

What are some "quiet" implements?

Sometimes you may find yourself in a situation where you need to make sure the noise of a spanking is kept quiet (whether it's because of children, roommates, being on vacation, etc.). For those types of situations, the quietest spanking implements that I've heard of are below. 

  • Loopy johnny 
  • Cane
  • Wooden spoon 
  • Tilt wand
  • Switch  
Some people consider majority of those implements listed above as pretty severe implements (and, some don't. It's just a personal preference). So, for that reason, there are other "quiet punishments" you could do such as silent spankings, corner time, writing lines, etc. But, if you're "dead set" on spanking, there's some options for you.
What implements are best for beginners?
When most people first begin DD, they start with the very basics (which I think is a good idea). The "very basics" I'm referring to is usually just the HoH's hand. However, if they want to begin using implements, I recommend easing into them (like with just about all other aspects of DD). Implements like a wooden hairbrush, wooden spoon, or something else thin/light/not very severe like a paint stirrer. 
What is the best way to prevent or avoid bruises and welts?
To put it simply: Spank longer, but lighter. This will achieve the same effect, most likely, as a shorter but harder spanking, but will greatly reduce the risks of marks. Additionally, warm up spankings, and breaking the spanking into "sets" could also help. 
Where do you keep your implements?
I'm not really sure why this question is so fascinating for people, but regardless, I'll answer it. We keep ours in our closet. However, some couples keep theirs under the bed (or under the mattress), in the dresser, etc. It just varies by couple. But, ours are kept in our bedroom closet. 
What about spanking with a coat hanger?
Spanking with a coat hanger seems dangerous to me, only because it seems it would leave a lot of marks. Regardless, I haven't been spanked with one, so I can't say for sure. If someone chooses to use a coat hanger, that's their choice I'm sure there are worst things they could use.
Any tips for making your own implements?
Not really, sorry. :-( I don't know much about making your own implements. I've heard of people making their own paddles (and, my tip for that would be to make sure it's really sanded down) and their own loopy johnny's (although I have no idea how). But, unfortunately I don't have any tips other than that. If someone has some, feel free to share! 
There you have it, everyone! 
Enjoy the rest of your week! I hope these guides were helpful, and informative, to you. :-)
-Chelsea      
  
 

Sunday, August 12, 2012

5 Things - Week 2 (The "Lots of Big Changes" Edition)

If you're confused what this is all about, read the first entry here



I have to admit, I'm liking this "5 Things" blog idea because it gives me a chance to put things that, ordinarily, I would have made into separate, short, blog entries all in one spot. 

 1: We're buying a house! Custom building a home is a very long, stressful, drawn out process. Originally we were planning on renting a home while it was being built. However, with some new opportunities coming up for my husband at work which require us to be quite a distance away from where our rental house was originally planned for, we have just decided to buy then probably resell in a couple of years when our home is done being built. Needless to say, we're excited. We found the perfect neighborhood (with like the worlds coolest pool..our son is going to absolutely love it) so now it's just a matter of finding a house. We have it narrowed down to 4 that we love, so we're going this week to hopefully pick out the final one and start the ever so fun homebuying process (that I hate). Wish us luck! 

2: We have BIG changes coming soon! After a whole lot of thinking, planning, and more, we have decided to launch our own website. The site concept is still in the works, somewhat, but here's the general idea: both my husbands blog, and mine, will be housed in one spot (two separate tabs). Also on our new site will be the network, personals site, bookstore (that will feature our new books, that we're in the process of writing, videos, and more), DD forums by area (to meet people local, or in the general section of the country/world as you), and a lot more, all in a more easier to read and navigate format. Needless to say, we are extremely excited about it. It's a lot of work, and money, but we're extremely anxious to get this up in rolling in the late fall of 2012. Stay tuned, everyone! For now, we just have a basic landing page up, but you can go ahead and bookmark the site now, if you want. The URL is http://www.learningdd.com 

3: Implements Guide Part 2 will be up early next week. Sorry for the brief delay between the 2 entries- those guides take a lot of time to write. In case you missed part 1, you can check it out here

4: "Interview with Bonnie" - Bonnie writes the blog Bottom Smarts which has long been known as sort of a "spanking intersection" for people. It's got tons of links to every type of blog relating to spanking imaginable and is worth checking out. Recently, this blogger interviewed Bonnie, and it was pretty interesting- you should check it out!

5: Mozzarella Stuffed Homemade Meatballs. Unfortunately, I don't have a link, but I posted the recipe below. Trust me folks, these things are amazing. I'm making them today, actually. :-) 

Mozzarella Stuffed Homemade Meatballs

  • 1 lb of lean ground beef (as lean as you can get- preferably like 95/5 or 97/3)  
  • 1/2 cup of bread crumbs (either Italian or Panko)
  • 1 tablespoon of worcestershire sauce 
  • 1 teaspoon of salt 
  • 1 teaspoon of ground black pepper
  • 1 tablespoon of minced garlic
  • 1/3 cup diced white onion
  • 1 1/2 tablespoons of olive oil
  • 1/4 cup of milk
  • 1/2 teaspoon of garlic salt
  • 1 tablespoon of Italian seasoning
  • 1/2 cup of fresh Romano cheese (grated) (you can also use parmesan) 
  • 10 mozzarella balls (you have to use fresh mozzarella, in order for this to be out of this world good. You can find it at places like Whole Foods)
1: Preheat oven to 350 degrees and grease a baking dish with olive oil
2: Combine all ingredients (except mozzarella balls, and olive oil) into a large bowl and stir to combine. (This step is basically just mixing everything together for the meatballs)
3: Time to form the mixture into meatballs! You want to take about 1/4 of a cup of ground beef at a time and roll it into a ball using your thumb to make an indent in the beef. Then, take a mozzarella ball and place it it in the middle, and cover with the remainder of the meat (you want to completely enclose the cheese)
4: Repeat until all of the meatballs have been made, then bake at 350 degrees for about 35-40 minutes. 
5: Serve with pasta and homemade sauce (seriously, if you haven't made homemade pasta sauce you need to start- it's incredible).
I'll take a picture after I make them today, and edit this entry, probably.
Also: Happy 1st Wedding Anniversary to Cate and Nate! And, congratulations on the birth of your beautiful baby girl. :-) We are SO happy for you both! 
Happy Birthday to one of my best friends, Mia. Mia and I met in college, went through grad school together, and pretty much spent every weekend together in our "college days". Mia, I love you like a sister. Happy Birthday! I can't wait to celebrate with you on our next Texas trip!   
If you have emailed me lately, I am about 4-6 weeks behind on emails. Yeah, that's fantastic huh? Sorry everyone. I promise I'm getting to them! 
Finally, Pooky did an awesome "spin off" of my 5 things post this week. Go check it out! It's really creative. You can read it here.
Have an AWESOME rest of your weekend, everyone! 
-Chelsea  

Monday, August 6, 2012

The Spanking Implements Guide: Part 1

Before my husband and I started domestic discipline I used to think that things such as wooden spoons really wouldn't hurt if someone struck you with it. Well, actually, before I started domestic discipline I didn't even think people would use something like a wooden spoon to spank someone with. Those are for cooking. Same with paddles- I always thought of them as things that decorated the walls of fraternities. I thought belts were used as clothing accessories, canes were used for walking, hairbrushes were used for making your hair look good, rulers were for measuring things, slippers were to wear on your feet, and the list continues.

And then we started domestic discipline. All the sudden a wooden spoon has a whole new meaning. I actually don't even know if we have any in our kitchen anymore. Same with the paddle. When someone references a paddle, I automatically think crap, those hurt! not yeah that reminds me of college Greek Life days. It's amazing how common household objects have a whole new meaning when you are in a DD marriage.

Spanking implements are a pretty important part of DD to a lot of people. The dilemma of which to use, where to buy them, which hurts worse, and much more is pretty frequently discussed. This guide is going to have 2 parts. The first part (below) is going to be an overview of the most common (and some uncommon) spanking implements, and a "pain rating scale". Part 2 will have frequently asked questions regarding implements, how to select which to spank with, where to find/buy spanking implements, and more. Hopefully this helps answer a lot of peoples questions, and gives you some new resources. :-)

I apologize in advance for the length of this (hey, at least I broke it into 2 parts!). I was actually going to make this into a short eBook, but decided against it (you're welcome). Enjoy, everyone! Also, if anyone wants a printable (.pdf or .doc) version, more information, the "shortened"/condensed version, etc. feel free to email.

The Spanking Implements Guide: Part 1


First, let me just say that the topic of implements is one that a lot of "DD wives" absolutely hate, and I get that. Trust me, I hate being spanked - let alone with something like a paddle. Just the thought of that sucks, let alone actually having it happen. So, needless to say, I understand why the topic of spanking implements can be one a lot of people don't even want to think about. The bottom line though is they are not as scary as you might think. In fact, some days I'd rather be spanked with something like a wooden spoon (or something else that's light) as opposed to my husbands hand because being spanked with someones hand (especially if your husband is strong..) isn't as pain-free as some may think. The point I'm trying to make is some implements are definitely "scary" for lack of a better word. But, it isn't a topic that is as scary as you might think. Some are really mild, and some aren't, but you'll find what works best for you and your marriage/situation.

NOTE: Some of the links within this entry reference some pretty questionable websites where implements are sold. The link on my blog should link directly to the page with the implement I'm referring to. Anything else that you may choose to find while browsing around the site, most likely, does not reflect on my personal views on what is/is not ok within DD. 


What do I get spanked with?

I get this question on, what seems like, a daily basis. "Chelsea, what spanking implements does your husband use?". Well, you're about to find out. I actually might update this later with pictures of the actual implements but at the moment I'm being way too lazy to go find them, take pictures, upload them, etc. So, the images below are taken from the site where he purchased them, with the exception of some. (like the hand, wooden spoon, etc)

Each DD marriage is different, and no two people practice the same. In our DD marriage, my husband often time uses a combination of implements. For example- his hand for the warmup, then the paddle and belt for the spanking. That's just an example, and it isn't like that in every case, but you see what I mean.


Hand

My husband uses his hand for things like maintenance spankings, warm ups, or "swats". I can't remember the last time I got spanked solely with his hand though (other than swats). Sometime I miss those days! 

Wooden Spoon 


I think the one we have came from Target, but I honestly can't remember. Regardless, above is what it looks like - except I drew all over ours, and it's kinda half broken (why don't you all ask my husband how that happened. Come on, go for it!). But, at one point in time, that's what it looked like.

My husband uses the wooden spoon for warm ups (pretty much every time) or reminder spankings. Sometimes it's used for minor offenses too.

Wooden Paddle



This is the most common implement he uses, by far. It's used for "regular spankings", minor ones (a few swats) sometimes, and pretty much every time I get spanked (that isn't maintenance, swats, or reminders) it's involved to some degree. I guess that would be why I hate it.

Here is the paddle we have. We've had it for awhile now, and trust me, it definitely makes me think twice about breaking any rules.

Strap

In our house, the strap is usually used in conjunction with the paddle (he splits the number of strikes). I've always considered it more of an intermediate or advanced level spanking implement though, simply because it's a lot harder to control than something like a paddle, and the sting is pretty intense (although, in my opinion, it's really short). I don't get the strap that often, actually, but when I do it definitely stings.

 Hairbrush


 I used to get spanked with the hairbrush a lot....and then my husband discovered the ever-so-wonderful (not) paddle and now my days of being spanked with the hairbrush are gone (kinda a bittersweet feeling, because although it sucks, I definitely think it's better than the paddle!).

Anyway, above is the exact hairbrush I have. It's made by Aveda, and you can buy it here. Ironically, it's called a paddle brush. But, let me tell you, if you're a girl, you must own one of these. Just don't let your husband see it. :-) It's the best hairbrush in the world- it makes your hair so shiny and soft. But, it can also really sting if your husband gets a hold of it- just a warning.

Cane


The number of times it's crossed my mind to throw this dumb thing away is a lot. However, I've decided against it, but still, the cane sucks. Thankfully, I only have been spanked with the cane during severe offenses, so it isn't very often.

The cane we have is more of like a wooden stick thing (like you see above). But, it packs quite the sting. My husband bought it at the same place he bought our paddle, and you can see it here.

So, there you have it. That's pretty much everything I get spanked with. Some are pretty intense, but they are definitely behavior changers, let's just put it that way. Now that we've got that fun trip into our "implement box" out of the way, onto the rest of the guide..

The Most Common Spanking Implements 

Like I said before, everyone does DD differently, and everyone spanks with different implements. However, below are the most common spanking implements. 

The opinions in this section are mine, for the ones I've been spanked with (which are basically the implements included in the section above) and I consulted other people who I know have been spanked with the rest, in order to get their take on them. Since not everyone feels the same thing, or the same way, you can take these opinions with a grain of salt, if you want, but I just thought they would help everyone. :-)

Hand



I think every single DD wife has been spanked with her husband's hand at some point, right? It's by far the most common. The best part about it, for the spanker, is that it's always there. So, it makes it easy to do things like swats, reminder spankings, etc. 

In general, hand spankings are the least severe out of everything. When you start adding implements in is when the pain increases some, so hand spankings are the most mild, in most cases. Also, hand spankings tend to leave the sting of the spank just on the surface of the skin, meaning the chances of getting any sort of damage from a hand spanking (i.e.- welts, bruises, extreme soreness, etc.) is very minimal. 

For beginners and those new to DD, hand spankings are probably the best route to go at first (in my opinion). It's good to establish a "spanking foundation" so to speak, so you don't want to just jump right in and begin using implements. Thus, the hand is the best to start with. But, for those who consider themselves to be out of the "beginner phase" of DD, spanking with the hand I probably wouldn't recommend for every single spankable offense only because there needs to be a severity line/scale created somewhere. 

Wooden Spoon



I heard somewhere once (and I wish I could remember where, so I could cite it) that the concept of being spanked by a wooden spoon originated back in like the 1950's when men would use the wooden cooking spoon to spank their wives there in the kitchen for not having dinner ready on time.

Now, obviously, that's not something I'd recommend and I think that sounds a tad ridiculous. But, at the same time, it makes a couple points. The first is that it's a popular implement, and has been around forever. The second is that it's a very "on the spot" type implement, much like using your hand. It can be used wherever (to an extent) and is something you probably have in 1 or 2 rooms of your house already so if the "need arises" it's readily available to most. A lot of people tend to favor it because it's very easy to find (you don't have to go to a specific spanking implement store to purchase one), and is probably something you already have around your house.

The wooden spoon is really lightweight, and the sting of it is pretty powerful. However, the sting only lasts for a few seconds, because it stays right on the surface. Like your hand, it's unlikely to cause any damage or long-term harm.

The wooden spoon is another implement that is ideal for beginners or those wishing to begin introducing implements. However, a lot of people (including us) transition into using the wooden spoon as a warm-up type implement as they progress further into domestic discipline. 

Hairbrush


 

Hairbrushes are another common spanking implement because, like wooden spoons, they're found in almost every household already. However, they're definitely a little more severe (in my opinion) than a wooden spoon because they're more dense. 

Hairbrushes, unlike some of the lighter implements, don't keep the sting on the surface. Therefore, some bruising or pain that lasts longer than you may expect could occur, depending on the number of strikes and severity. The other thing to be careful about with hairbrushes is they can crack easily. I'd recommend using a wooden one, over a plastic one, for that reason.

Belt

Belts are another commonly used spanking implement because just about everyone owns one. I think a lot of people also like belts because they're good "warning tools".  I've heard of several HoH's warning their wives to behave, while out in public or in a non-private situation, by tapping their belts. It may sound odd to some, but I hear that a lot. 

Belts are very similar to straps, except belts are more common I think, simply because more people have them. They're also a pretty traditional spanking implement. However, with belts you need to be careful because they can be very difficult to control. Also, belts can leave welts, if not used properly or if used too many times. It's extremely important that, if you decide to use a belt, you "double it over" so that it doesn't wrap around and cause damage to the sides, or front of the body on accident.  The pain from a belt seems pretty similar to a strap in that the pain stays primarily on the surface and produces a pretty sharp stinging sensation in the beginning, but fades pretty fast. 

I'd recommend belts for more advanced DD couples simply because they are a lot harder to control, and they're also more severe implement as opposed to something like a wooden spoon. 

Wooden Paddle


 
Wooden paddles are another extremely common spanking implement, especially in America. They're commonly featured in DD blog entries, videos, websites, stories, and more. It's almost like the "traditional spanking implement" it seems.
 
People seem to like wooden paddles for a variety of different reasons. I asked my husband why he uses one and he said "it's associated with spanking more, and it seems to be the most effective." (and he's right, but that's beside the point) I've also heard people say they often spank with a wooden paddle because they're easy to make (if you know woodworking), and they can be altered quite a bit (you can add writing to them, put holes in them for extra sting, etc.). 

Wooden paddles are very dense (just like they look), so it's important to understand, especially if you have never used one before, that they need to be used with caution in order to prevent bruising. Unlike some other implements, wooden paddles also leave a sting a lot longer than you would expect. After a spanking, it feels like your bottom is on fire, and the burning sensation fades (eventually) to a really sore feeling- sometimes it feels like you're bruised, when you actually aren't. So, the pain with a paddling is definitely a little more intense, but at the same time, it's also very effective (on lots of people, not just me).


Cane

I included the cane because I know in the UK they are very common implements. Just as a warning up front: canes are severe implements.  Not like so severe that you can't tolerate it after 1 strike, or anything like that (at least you should be able to tolerate it if done correctly) but canes are definitely not meant to be used by beginners, or for every-day type offenses (in my opinion). Canes are typically reserved for the most severe offenses, repeated offenses, or I've heard of some couples using them only for dangerous offenses. However you choose to use the cane within your marriage is obviously up to you, but there's your warning- they aren't beginner level implements, despite the fact they look lightweight.
 
The other thing to know about canes is that they leave marks. Even one strike can leave a welt, although they usually fade pretty fast (especially if swung lightly). The bottom line though- canes are effective, but severe. So, use with caution. 

Uncommon Spanking Implements


Paint Stirrer

Paint stirrers are a lot like the wooden spoon. Good for beginners, sting fades rather quickly and they're lightweight. However, probably the best part about the paint stirrer is that they're free at almost any home improvement store.

Rubber Paddle

 

Rubber paddles are known to produce a more intense sting as opposed to a wooden paddle. However, most people say that instead of feeling the burning sensation after a spanking, like you would with a wooden paddle, the sensation is more of a tingling feeling, then turns into sore pain (similar to a wooden paddle). The rubber paddles are known to be more severe than wooden paddles, but are nice because the risk of bruising with one greatly decreases. 

I would recommend rubber paddles to anyone who considers themselves to be out of the "beginner DD" phase, due to the fact that I've heard it's more severe than a wooden paddle.

Loopy Johnny

 

These may be more common than I thought they were, since a lot of people often ask my husband and I about them. However, the general consensus from those I poled was "stick it under uncommon implements since they're hard to find, and not everyone has heard of them" so that's what I did. 


I've never been spanked with a loopy johnny. However, I've heard that it acts very similar to a cane. It's some peoples "implement of choice" (despite the fact that it's a lot more severe than some implements) because it's extremely quiet. So, for those who need a quiet spanking implement, this might be one to consider because most people say that it makes virtually no noise.

But, like the cane, I would strongly recommend this only be used by people who would consider themselves to be at an advanced domestic discipline level.

Ping Pong Paddle

 
Yet another paddle variation, except this one is much more easy to find. If you aren't into purchasing implements from designated spanking retailers, but still want to spank with a paddle, this might be for you. Although the ping pong paddle is a lot lighter than a wooden spanking paddle, and the pain afterwards is much less, the ping pong paddle is still a spanking implement that could be used by DD couples of all skill types.

As I'm sure you know, ping pong paddles are coated with a soft foam type padding with a light rubber coating. Therefore, the force of the spanking may need to be harder than what you would choose to use with another type of paddle because, in many aspects, the ping pong paddle is the lesser severe of the paddle types on the market.

Bath Brush

 
 The bath brush is basically a cross between a hairbrush and a paddle. It's a lot heavier than a traditional hairbrush, but a lot lighter than a traditional paddle, which makes it the "perfect combination" for a lot of people. 

Bath brushes, from what I've heard, are a lot more intense than a hairbrush spanking. I've even read some people call them "the worst implement ever!" but honestly, I don't know how accurate that is. Someone else may need to weigh in. But, what I do know is that bath brushes are easy to find, relatively inexpensive, and are good for a person looking for a cross between 2 very popular spanking implements: a paddle and a hairbrush.

Other Spanking Implements:

  • Switch
  • Wooden paddle with  holes
  • Lexan paddle
  • Flyswatter
  • Slipper
  • Spatula
  • Ruler
  • Strap
  • Tawse
  • Birch
  • Riding crop
  • Strap
  • Cutting board
  • Leather paddle
  • Tilt wand

Pain Scales

It may go without saying that everyone can tolerate pain differently. So, for this exercise, I gave the following list of spanking implements to 10 different people, all with different pain tolerances (some who have very high pain tolerances, and some with very low pain tolerances). Then, I took the averages of those numbers, and created the following pain scale. The implements were ranked on a 1-10 scale based on the following criteria: how intense the sting was during the spanking, how intense the sting/pain was after the spanking, how much they feared the implement, and how effective it was in terms of behaviors being modified due to pain from the spanking. 10 is the worst/hardest/most severe and a 1 is the lightest/easiest to deal with. Also, these are based on an average spanking of 20-30 swats at 3/4 strength. I didn't do all of the spanking implements, only some. So, if there's a specific one you'd like to see, let me know.

Wooden paddle: 7.5
Wooden hairbrush: 5.5
Cane: 9
Wooden spoon: 4
Bath brush: 7.5
Belt: 6
Hand: 2
Switch: 7
Loopy Johnny: 8.5
Wooden paddle with holes: 8.5

Stay tuned for the Spanking Implements Guide Part 2 coming soon!  

 

 




Sunday, August 5, 2012

5 Things!

This new blog series is called Five Things. A friend of mine (Kristen, you're awesome) gave me this idea after seeing it around some non-DD blogs, and so I modified it a little. It will go up every Sunday. Enjoy. :)



How it works is you pick 1 personal thing, 2 DD things, 1 DD blog entry of the week, and 1 website of the week (personal, or DD related) to write something short about. 

So, here we go for the first ever edition of Five Things! 

1: We took a mini-vacation! I have this thing about planning vacations. I don't know why. My husband and I have always loved traveling, and that hasn't stopped since our son has been born. This past week we took a very spur of the moment (I literally booked the hotel rooms that morning!) trip, and it was much needed. We had a blast shopping, swimming, eating at some amazing restaurants (pretty sure I had the best burger of my life!) and going to the park. It was much needed. But, like any vacation, when it ends it's hard to come back to reality. In fact, our suitcase still isn't unpacked. That's on today's agenda, hopefully. 

2: Maintenance spankings have apparently returned. Go ahead and imagine my excitement. Trust me, it isn't much. Just  when I thought my husband had thrown the idea of maintenance spankings back into the bin labeled "not for us"..they reemerged. I'm trying to look at the bright side (these should help me prevent punishment spankings, and therefore complete my 1 year challenge, right??) but it's still hard. I've went awhile now without getting spanked (5 weeks! Jackpot!) and the thought of maintenance spankings reemerging from the past just makes me cringe. But, hey, like I said, there is a bright side here. I just need to keep remembering that.

3: Implements. I've decided to do an "Implements Guide" post. It'll be the next one posted here (I think I scheduled it to go up on Tuesday? I can't remember). I've already got quite a few FAQ's for it, but if you have any more implement questions you'd like to see included, feel free to send them over. This post will hopefully help a lot of people. That's the goal, at least. :-)

4: "My Inspiration To Be A Better HoH". Alright, I swear I won't link my husbands blog every week (although that's tempting!) but I really did love this post that my husband put up this past week. It's beyond sweet, but more than that I think it really shows the emotions that men also face in a DD marriage. It's just very well written all together. Maybe I'm a little biased, but I truly loved it. :-) 

5: Dart It Up! This site is Pinterest for guys. Since the whole world is already aware of my Pinterest obsession (or, they should be by now!) it's no wonder why I think this site is a genius idea. Now I should just convince my husband about how much fun this site will be for him! 

Also: I would like to say Happy Birthday to my friend Christina who had a birthday this past week. Her husband wrote an adorable blog entry for her in honor of it. Happy Birthday Christina! 

Also, Happy Anniversary to Liz and her husband who celebrated their 26th wedding anniversary this past week. That is absolutely awesome. Happy Anniversary guys!