Saturday, October 1, 2011

Opening Up The Boot Camp Can Of Worms

It's a pretty well known fact that I suck with can openers (I think there's a video floating around somewhere of when my husband taped me trying to use our electric can opener. It isn't as easy as it sounds!) so..maybe that's why the "boot camp can of worms" has stayed pretty tightly shut. Well, up until last week when I started to open it just a little bit. I didn't really think the "boot camp" curiosity would explode like it has. Between the comments, emails (that both my husband and I have gotten), text messages, etc. people are definitely curious.

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I guess I should have known, when I wrote that last entry regarding boot camp, that people who hadn't heard of it yet would ask, which is fine. I should have been prepared to do a "here's boot camp 101" entry, but I wasn't and I'm still not.

I don't want boot camp to sound like some kind of super-secretive operation that only those with "insider knowledge" get to do. It's not like that. My main reason for not putting "boot camp 101" out there is because I really believe it's something that would create a giant firestorm of opinions and a huge uproar for some people. The other reason is I believe that boot camp is pretty much something that should either be recommended to you on a case by case basis, or something that you and your spouse mutually agree may be best for your marriage. It's also something that you need to tailor specifically to your marriage. There are many ways to do boot camp, and many "custom forms" and so writing a "boot camp 101" type thing really wouldn't even be benenficial because it can be changed, and should be changed, in many different ways depending on the couple and numerous other factors.

The reason I wrote that last entry on boot camp was really geared towards those who had already done boot camp (because it had been a rather "hot button" topic lately, and I'd seen boot camp posts on numerous other blogs). But the more I think about it, the more I think that wasn't really fair.

I'm still not comfortable doing a extremely detailed outline of boot camp because it's going to be different for every couple. However, I've decided I'll go ahead and do a basic outline of boot camp, for those who are thinking about trying it. I'll be posting that within the next few days, so stay tuned.

Before I sign off, I want to apologize if I made people feel left out about the whole boot camp thing. My reasons for not being so open about it are above, but still, I think it's a good idea to at least give people some information on it which they can then use (or not) to make a determination on whether or not boot camp would be right for them.

If anyone has any specific questions regarding boot camp that they want to see covered in that entry, please email them to me (my email is found on the contact me page at the top) or leave them in the comments below. Thanks!



  1. I like your sane approach. Although different, I felt the same about posting my rules- and held off doing so until I just had so many not blog about them would have made them seem extreme. I do get it.

    I also do not think boot camp is for every couple (or even for many at all) so it's good to show some caution.


  2. Our life is a constant boot camp. We have set up rules we have named ASRT (Articles of Submissive Rules & Training); we have a contract we have both signed where expectations are spelled out and agreed to & we have a Certificate of Ownership that lists me as my Master's property. We have set aside a space in our home that we call the Dungeon where we meet for specific ceremonies, have a weekly meeting, receive &return my assignments & my punishments are meted out. So the training never ends & we continue to grow our relationship.